Hello everyone. Friends, strangers, perverts, hackers.
So, about this blog:
Until today, I was blog-less. Mmmhmm. In this high-speed, technological society, here I was, lacking an outlet so flaunt my superior intellect and wit. (Kidding) But yeah, anyway. You always hear about bloggers getting ginormous advertising deals and huge followings, and they always start off with humble beginnings. So I figured, I've got humble beginnings, why don't I make a blog and turn it into some massive media outlet with bajillions of devoted fans?
And so, hear I am. Posting this blog and hoping that people will read it fervently. No, I want people's lives to revolve around it. I've got high expectations for this. I am going to make Perez Hilton, the Smosh Kids, and Tila Tequila look like faceless hobo's in this second-generation, Web 2.0 world of instant, internet celebrities.
Now that you're aware of my intentions of cyber-domination, the real fun begins.
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So, I watched that new show last night. The one about the search for the next Pussycat Doll. It was ok, but I must say, I was a little pee-o'd that it was hosted by that nasty assface Mark McGross of Sugar Gay. Seriously though. Why is he always shows like American Idol, or the new PCD show? Does anyone listen to Sugar Ray anymore? How many hits did they even have, if any? Personally, I only remember hearing like two songs on the radio as a kid, and I don't think they even made the top of the countdowns on the local radio stations of rural Nova Scotia, let alone in the rest of the world.
Why is it, then, that I seemed to be constantly plagued by that man's beady little eyes and asschin? Like, honestly, what has he done for American (and, subsequently, Canadian) culture? And furthermore, like what the hell is his audience/appeal, anyway?! One year, he's playing with Sevendust on Leno, the next, he's in a God-forsaken Scooby-Doo movie! Next, he does a single with Shania Twain, then, a single for the new "Herbie" flick. Double-you tee eff!?
I've come to the conclusion that Mr. McGrath will do anything to make a quick buck. That's right, ladies stuck in the nineties who still find him attractive, anything.
Back to the PCD show. (Maan, I really need to go look up what that was called.) Was anyone else as creeped out as I was about that sick chick? She gave like half of the competitors some nasty virus. Screw anthrax, al-Quaeda should mail that bitch to the White House.
Ta,
Jordan
